We start the episode at Khloe and Lamars episode talking about the couples bowl movements. I have to give Khloe credit: after two years of marriage, she gas kept her bodily residue a secret from Lamar.. Now, that’s impressive.
We then visit the sentimental Bruce who plans a family trip for his 20th wedding anniversary. When he announces the location, Kris puts a nice wet towel on the situation. Watching the couple together, I realize more and more that Kris has taken Bruces testicles, and attached them to her.
Over in New York, Kim introduces Kris, the biological man, to her best friend Loren. Loren is so accepting of Kris, and the couple even pretend to be engaged… Mhm, I wonder what happens next!
Two seconds later, Loren, Rob and Khloe are all together on a yacht. Khloe opens up the floodgates about her sentiments of Kris, and in typical Khloe fashion she has nothing nice to say. I understand where Khloe is coming from, but she must remember, she got married in less than a month.
Kourtney and Khloe visit an asian hoarder house and Khloe announces that she isn’t going to Bora Bora. kourtney instantly becomes nervous because she doesn’t know Kris ( the one with the real balls) and doesn’t want to “get in it”. Again, Kourtney should be the most accepting considering Kim has always defended Scott.
Before the trip to Bora Bora, Momager of the year visits the plastic surgeon for a lift. Apparently, home girl doesn’t feel good about her body, but after birthing six children, she should be embracing the fact that she’s not 450 lbs, and if that doesn’t put a smile on that botox face, she can always calculate how much money she is making for selling the exclusive photos from the trip!
Vacation with family is always a sticky situation, and bringing a new boyfriend does not help the tension ( I feel your pain, Kim!) It was so nice to see baby mason! Thanks E! for forking over the money to film him before he’s 45 and balding!
We see the first sights of Bora Bora and it is absolutely breathtaking! The perfect back drop for family drama! The Kardashians start the vacation by getting laid, and scott brings up the “shoving money in waiters mouth scenario”.. Way to go! Kris starts the vacation by telling Scott to show more affection: clearly, he didn’t see the Kourtney and Kim take New York season. Once off the boat, Momager of the year once again brings down the mood by saying she will definitely be keeping her clothes on. Kim starts complaining about her large room with gorgeous flowers… I can see why she’s so upset… Those flowers were picked 6 hours in advance and clearly were wilting! This anxiety ridden side of Kim I quite the eye opener for Kris. Rumor has it that for the honeymoon he rented a broom closet to reduce Kims anxiety.
The episode ends wit Kim saying she will jump in the water, and the happy couple play around in the water. Kendall and Kylie start doing flips, and Kris playfully throws Kim in the water. It was all fun and games until Kim looses her $75,000 earrings. ( on an aside, WHY ARE YOU WEARING $75,000 earrings on vacation?!) She leaves crying, and we are left wondering what the next 10 days are going to bring us!
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